Trust me, I know what I'm doing.
Political junkie, curmudgeon, ass man.
Hillbilly's Quick Guide to What's Goin on Over Yonder in Iran and such
Anyhow it was in that lodge, next to a woodstove, I heard the phrase "let's nuke'am and take their fuckin' oil"
I heard that statement, or some variant of it like, 100 friggin times during the lead up to the "war" in Iraq, but this time I had to wonder just how many times you had to beat a dog with the same stick before it would just lay down and give up.
I thought about that statement, and the guy who said it as soon as these protests broke out in Iran. Though I might seem like a pessimistic, jaded curmudgeon and child of the 80's-90's, there lays in me a hopeless optimist. An optimist that hoped maybe the same guy watched the news and thought "Hey wait a minute! Not all of these people are burning American flags and trying to kill us! My mind is fucking blown!" That's probably not happening, but you never know.
The current leader, (whose name I don't feel like spelling so I'll just call him 'the incumbent') most likely won the election, in spite of tampering, and a suspiciously absent Katherine Harris. He won by popularity amongst the poorer class of Iranians. See, the incumbent was born into poverty, and provides some benefits to those in poverty by way of you filling up your H2 and driving your fat ass somewhere you don't need to be in the first place. Previous leaders have tried hard to ignore their destitute. (see? we're not so different afterall)
The opponent in the election is from Iran's small but growing suburban/urban class who are more educated. By no means is he some huge reformer, or the Iranian equivalent of Barack Obama. His major platform differences aren't anything to get too excited about. Our incredibly shitty American media outlets would like you to think otherwise. Sure, attitudes towards the west might improve a little, but don't go making vacation plans anytime soon.
What is exciting is that a significant chunk of Iran's population is around 30 years old, and simply unwilling to put up with the bullshit, misogyny, and tyranny they've had to put up with, and are willing to fight for their freedoms. I hope they win, I hope there's change, and I admire their bravery. I had to question my own people and wonder if they'd be as willing to risk their very lives, or would they just sit here, patiently waiting it out until the next election, listening to their iPod writing scathing blogs under the moniker of 'TheJoeD'
Laying Low
I'm tired, exhausted, my feet hurt, and my to-do list is already an arms length long.
For the last four years I've been consumed with many things. I started doing martial arts after a friend of mine died and I needed a distraction before I drank myself to death, so I did that for three years, and my weekends seemed to be taken up by the routine of no drinking on Fridays, work your ass off on Saturdays in fighting class, and then be too sore to move on Sundays.
Two years ago I started grad school and it became more and more difficult to get to martial arts, and then I started taking Saturday classes at school, and after doing that for months and only having one weekend day to relax, and by relax I mean run around like a decapitated chicken trying to run all my errands, and get all my home repairs in and still find time to decompress from my job and the few assholes I've had to put up with in this past semester.
Buying my house was a huge ball of stress too with all the problems I faced with that, and only now am I *really* starting to enjoy my purchase.
So that's it. I'm going fishing down at the river. Driving around in my old Ford with the crackly old radio going. Trying to get the grass on my lawn to be all of one color and species. I'm going to do nothing but think for a while, and try to feel something other than my teeth grinding together. I have stuff I want to write about, and it'll come out eventually. I'm going to swim at my favorite lake. I'm going to set up my workshop and my tiki bar in my basement...at whatever damned pace I feel like moving at.
It's going to be effin sweet
Ruiner
I did exactly what I didn't do as an undergrad, and got all of the difficult courses out of the way early, leaving a handful of what I would consider 'filler courses' for this last stretch.
This has been the absolute most miserable, un-fun sack of garbage I've ever had to deal with. The last three classes are group oriented, and in the last two my group has done nothing but argue, bicker, and just plain be Nazis.
Right now I have a middle age woman in my group who is freaking the fuck out over our final project and trying to micromanage every detail to the point where it's just absolutely unbearable to be in the same room as her. To be honest, her contributions aren't even that great.
We're writing up a business plan for a fucking video store! Not hard!
The other member of the group is leaving for a wedding and won't be able to attend the final class and present with us. This to me is no big deal considering my awareness of the fact that people have lives outside of the classroom....hell most of 'em even have jobs.
But now I'm stuck with this awful woman. Alone.
My group in the course prior to this were fucking skeevs as well. I have a fundamental philosophy about academic work. There is no point to fluffing up a relatively meager assignment with an extra seven pages of filler. I believe in concise and precise answers, analysis of the data, whatever. If I can make that happen in two or three pages, I'm satisfied, and 90% so is the professor. Some people just can't seem to wrap their head around that. They also can't seem to acknowledge that significant grammatical changes are necessary is English isn't your primary language. I don't think it's insulting to point out syntax errors in a professional manner.
Anyways, I had considered going back in another year or two for another certificate program but to hell with that.
RIP David Carradine
Pretty bummed out.
Pondering
$8.62 for a 10pc Chicken McNugget meal? Really? I didn't even supersize.
Why does it take other people so long to realize that a person isn't unlucky, they're just a fucking idiot?
Discuss.
Driving through the tops of my eyes.
I think and drive. Any time I need to loosen up the brain juices, the purr of the engine lets me unwind a little.
I think I got comfortable during the Bush years in a way. They were so chaotic and pathetic at the same time and it was impossible not to be passionate about something.
Now there's this low roar of peace. I suppose I'm using the word 'peace' pretty loosely considering we're still fighting two wars, but I really feel that we have optimistic blood flowing through our veins right now rather than that general sense of 'oh god, what's next?"
I mean, did anyone listen to the President's speech on Gitmo? I only was able to catch a part of it, but man, we elected an intelligent person! It's amazing.
Anyhoo...I've been really taken in by two movies lately. The first one is Gran Torino. I mean, I've mentioned the movie a half dozen or so times already, so I'll spare it this time.
The main character has clear cut principles. Right, wrong, or indifferent, you know where he stands. I don't know if that's a trait I'll ever have. I keep changing, changing my mind, waivering, forgetting, obsessing, etc. I suppose it's not desireable to be completely stuck in one's ways, but I think it'd be admirable to be somewhat defineable. I can't seem to define myself in my own head, and I'm afraid simplifying can be way to complicated. I want to be and live simply. I know already that I haven't ever measured my success by material goods. I don't need granite countertops or the smallest wireless device I can get my hands on to tout how far along I am. I have my vices like old cars. There's a Zen-like feeling bringing one back to life that is an entirely other subject that maybe only a handful of others could relate to anyway.
So in this swamp of undefineableness (probably not a word, but is now) I've been trying to decide what the hell I am passionate enough about to make a career out of, and god dammit I want a CLEAR MISSION. I don't want to toil away my years in an unsatisfying job run by capitalist pigs.
Quantum of Solace is the other movie. Not a particularly great James Bond film. A little over-the-top and Bourne -like, but it was cool because of the story line. It was about environmental terrorism, specifically to do with water. While still an undergrad I was turned on to the new complications with water around the world, and let me tell you; it's ugly. Foreigners and corporations buying up our water supply and selling it back to us, etc. And seriously, way to build cities in the middle of the fucking desert! Decadence will be the death of us.
I'm passionate about water.
I'm passionate about guns too. I was raised around guns, and learned responsible gun ownership and use. There is no need for assault weapons in the hands of civilians. Shooting watermelons and beer cans off your fence with a Kalishnikov isn't *that* cool. That's not your right to do that, and you can jump up and down and piss on about the second ammendment, but we're no longer under the threat of an occupying army. Also, the lifting of the assault weapons ban can be traced by dotted line to the SERIOUS fucking problem we're having right now at our Mexican border with the cartels, so thanks a lot. I suppose now you'll need an assault weapon to protect yourself against people with assault weapons, eh?
If only somehow I could become master of America and allow gun ownership only under strict IQ requirements, or, ya know, close the loopholes and tell the NRA to get used to sucking my balls.
I wish I was the full moon shining off a Camaro's hood...
I had seen it before, but not really taken in by it until a dreadfully dull class on Management Info Systems led me to surf the web, eventually landing at Chevrolet's website. It makes the Mustang look chinsy, and the Challenger look like a bulbous pig.
The 2010 Camaro rules. It's what I had asked Santa for among the doom and gloom news about the economy and GMs potential collapse. Is it too little too late, or just enough right on time? Who knows, but it's the car I had wanted to see 7 years ago when GM decided to discontinue the Camaro/Firebird line-up.
The new Camaro SS is just phenomenal 426 pavement shredding, tire incinerating horespower. The penis envier in me wants it...but I'll settle for the 304 horsepower V-6 that....oh MY GOD....comes with a manual transmission and dual exhaust and cheaper sticker price, cheaper to insure, and flirting with 30 MPG. No more snooze inducing automatics that won't let you have any fun. No siree. This guy has something to save for now: The bottom of the line 1LS Camaro with as few options as possible, and the kinda bad ass in their own way cheapo wheels. Oh, and in Victory red please.
Call me crazy, but being a car guy, this car has lifted my spirits incredibly.
Consulting (part II?)
I stumbled into a roundy today. A place that's had about 50 different businesses in the same spot. I took my old girlfriend out there some previous incarnation of the same restaurant back in about '01 or '02. Since then, theres been three other choke & pukes.
As I now live in the area where this place is, I had been watching them tear the plywood off the doors and windows, and hang a new sign, I thought I'd swing in before they're swallowed in debt and start serving spoiled food and olives.
They did a nice job, and hired a hot mama behind the bar (hot mamas are hot and her boobies were spec! +1 point).
Anyways, the problem with this place, that's a chronic problem is that RIGHT next to it is an abandoned gas station. It's robbing the curb appeal factor, and man, that's like 60% of the factor.
I inquired about the the eyesore to Hot MommieBoobies, and she said that the owner of the gas station had serious concerns when it came to the EPA. ( I knew what she meant, it's the reason my grandfather closed his doors in '94 because his body shop which was a former Hudson dealership had buried a lot of...well...hazardous waste, and it'd cost a fortune to clean up)
But OK. I've been looking into starting a little consulting firm on the side, and I thought this:
Get your friends to park their extra cars in the abandoned lot. It'll attract people because it'll look like a hoppin' joint. If when they get inside it seems deserted, imply that there's a whole lotta specialty cooks just waiting to serve you.
The decor was pretty decent, but they were playing SHITTY 80's music in the bar. Music defines a bar, at least when it comes to bars where you can hear the music, a decent playlist or jukebox will make or break your joint, it'll define your clientele and this joint couldn't afford to play predictability.
80's music might seem cool and exotic to my dads generation, but not to me. I'm 28 going on 29 and have a little cash to burn, play something that'll pique my interest, not the interests of Hawaiian shirt donning dingleberries. When I called the waitress out on the music, she said that they had first tried classic rock. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (for a number of reasons.)
I gave cutie patootie a 40% tip, which means I won't be back.
Sees the End
I've fallen way off the path of Taoism/Buddhism over the last few months...I kind of really let myself down, but in that I kind of accepted 'I am who I am'.
Seeing the end of something is never really clear. Us humans have the unique abilities to see the ends of things that don't apply to us. Ever seen a relationship that's over, but that friend or relative just can't come to terms?
I think I've just seen it happen career wise. You reach an impasse where you've made all the changes and improvements that you can, but the progress is crumbling behind you as you tackle new problems, but you're hitting a wall because you just can't move up that ladder quick enough. It's the grunts that run the business while the generals are out golfing. As money grows, care diminishes.
My job is what it is: a Jell-O mold that you'll never get creative with.
Call me sometime, baby.
We need more Steve McQueens cutting through the night air in a Porsche or a Mustang, smoking a Lucky Strike, and a dame on the right arm in between shifts. The guy could race cars, do his own stunts, and was a student of Bruce Lee...fuck! That's awesome!
And on manhood, not to make this a post about people lacking machismo, but hey, it didn't do you a lot of good to bounce the fucking basketball around in your driveway your whole life, did it? No, you can't even mow your own fucking lawn, or hang up a picture without using the wrong end of the hammer. Where's your Man Card? It's revoked.
Mine's got a picture of John Wayne and Bob Vila drinking a beer and pinching a German beer maid's ass. So take your backwards cap, jersey wearing ass over to the side and watch while I do it right.
American Taliban
From the article:
The handbook for the 84-student Christian school says rock music "is part of the counterculture which seeks to implant seeds of rebellion in young people's hearts and minds."
Burn that shit to the ground.
Ethics Fail
Last week I was driving through a rich neighborhood on my way to school and I saw a lawnmower out with the trashcans, so I picked it up and threw it in the back of my truck.
Yesterday I finally got around to it. I changed the oil, cleaned it up, fixed a bum wheel, and mowed my yard with it. I saved the environment by that sucker not being tossed into a scrap metal bin, and onto China where it'd be melted down by a factory bellowing out smoke...right?
But since I needed a mower, and got a free one, I didn't stimulate the economy.
Oh what have I done?!
Miss California
Also, whos idea was it to politicize an overblown beauty pageant anyways?
The First Thing That Breaks
I remember 13. That is the year toes dip in the ocean that is so, so fucking cold, but it's the most uncool thing ever if you run back to shore to mommy and her warm towels. You're in, so ya might as well piss in it to keep yourself warm.
Too much pressure on boys to become men. What's so cool? Why is it that the kids who grow early from alcoholic or absent parents are the ones to set the bar for us as to what's cool, or how tough you can be, or how sexually experienced?
It takes a long time to undo that thirst for extra toughness or badassery. I feel bad for the people that miss that train stop. I see them at the bar, it's not pretty, and hard not to smash a beer mug across their face just because...why not? Hypocricy? A little. that's life sailor...live with it or jump off the sides mid-shift.
The other aspect, which didn't seem to be a problem when I was younger, was everyone needing a fucking cookie.
Something that needs to be brought back as a societial norm, is the fact that losers exist, and just because you are one doesn't give you the right to shoot up an entire fucking school or place of employment. HIGH SCHOOL DOESN'T COUNT.
What's with the phony drama and morbid bullshit? Stop coddling your kids.
The more I think of Gran Torino, I don't want the Clint Eastwoods of the world to die off.
This post, like my life, is rife with contradiction.
Consulting
I hired a guy to replace some windows on my house, repair the sills, and patch a small hole.
The fella quoted me $900. Sounded pretty reasonable, so I gave him $300 down to order the windows.
Didn't hear back from him for ohhhhh a month or so.
He finally called me back and asked if he could come in the next day. I would have had to take the day off of work because I'm not the type of guy to leave my key under the mat for just anybody. Sure enough he said "uhhh eerrrhhh uhhhhmmmm uhhhh I'll have to call you back."
Two weeks pass.
We finally agree on a date, which was this past monday. I happened to have the day off, so it worked out pretty well.
So he starts work and he's like "ohhh there's a lot of water damage here, looks pretty extensive. You're probably looking at a few more days labor...might be an extra $1000."
Naturally, I wasn't happy, but sure enough, things were kinda bad since rain had been getting in between the walls for at least two years, but I bitched anyways and got one of those "well, I'll see what I can do" type responses.
So then, he drives off to get materials at Home Depot. 5 Minutes later he's driving in reverse all the way down my street and then exclaims "I lost my wallet!"
So, him and I are both rummaging around in the debris trying to find his wallet, so he was like "do you have a Home Depot charge?"
Yeah dude, I ended up going with him to buy the materials. So we're @ Home Depot for like an hour, then I help him load all that crap in his van, and he's like "are you hungry? wanna go to McDonalds?" So I was like nahhh....so then he's like "well, I'm pretty hungry, so I need a favor..."
Yeah dude, I had to buy the guy fucking burger king. Just then his wife called. He left his wallet @ home.
I probably will end up doing the other window myself since now I know how it's done.
Seriously, is this how someone runs a business? This is like, the fifth really dumb ass thing I've seen a small business owner do in the last couple of months. I'm thinking about starting a consulting firm.
So on top of allllllll that, I ended up having to help him for like an hour and a half.
He's gotta come back to finish this week. I pretty much told him to just wrap up what he was doing, and I'd call him when I was ready to get around to do the other window
Mods
I’ve been a honky tonkin’ time traveler for the last little bit. When I stood in my kitchen and thought “It doesn’t get much better than this” as I sipped my coffee and watched the sun rise in gold and purple creep through my old windows, it was only a matter of days before I went bananas.
I don’t always recommend going bananas, but sometimes it happens. As a friend said “Sometimes you just need to go crazy”. That made me feel alright, like I needed it to know some things. I know now that I’m me, and that’s pretty much it.
I never recommend soundtracking your freak out with country music from the 40’s to the early 70’s. You’ll spiral into a miserable hell, but ya know what? I feel like I came out of it with a much deeper appreciation of music. Of note: Jerry Lee Lewis. Yes, the same guy who sang Great Balls of Fire, High School Confidential, and Whole Lotta Shakin’ made some damn fine country music. “What’s made Milwaukee famous has made a fool out of me”. Indeed.
Dwight Yoakam’s ‘Long White Cadillac’. Listen to that song loud and over and over again. It’s brilliant. So is Rockabilly, both old and new. I kind of dig the scene.
I love to give a girl a whirl to an old juke box, and when my money’s all gone, I telephone “Hey hey mama, can your daddy come home?”
I had to identify pressures and make modifications. Lots of things that I dismissed with “I can handle that”, well I couldn’t. No sweat. There’s nothing heroic or macho about putting too much on your plate. We’ve got a problem here with people needing master’s degrees to compete. I can’t take the bureaucracy anymore. I’m plotting a blue collar escape (which is a plan that’s not too easy to hatch).
Nostalgia: We all want to go back to some time we’re fond of, but we only do it because we know how it ends, and that’s easy. I’d still like to go back to a time when men settled disputes with their bare knuckles and not rage and drug fueled shooting sprees. I never lived then, but listening to the music of your high school days can somehow make you feel young and irresponsible, and it feels damned good. If you were there, I want to know you so we can remember it together. It’s lonesome out here in the digital age.
Things that are AWESOME
That's all I can think of.
Useless Internetery
Here's a gem from my credit union's site:
A cowboy went to town on Sunday on got to town on a Friday. It only took him 3 days to get to town.
Q: How is that possible?
A: his horses name is Sunday?
Amanda, Age 11
HAHAHAHAHAH! That's brilliant! Too bad about the horrible syntax errors though! Nothing like like answering a question and accidentally putting a question mark on the end. Is that a question? With some upward inflection like a valley girl? Is this rhetorical?
I HATE YOU!!!!!
Modern Love
My head swims like a fishbowl sometimes as I ponder whatever there is to ponder...primarily adulthood, it's horrible unwillingness to splurge on getting the waffle cone, and whether or not I'm even talking to the right soda jerks.
I think I've always been a hopeless romantic who overly romanticizes romance. I read things occasionally where a person just *knew* when they saw their better half for the first time, or widows who whisper sweet and croakley things about 50+ years of bliss. I don't know this? Should I? Am I doing it wrong?
I think in terms of "prettiest girl at the dance" or walking down a summer road hand in hand. How do I get there? Was I there already? Awww who the fuck knows. Dreams, and the "idea" of someone always fuck with your head, and generally surpass the actual person.
Something about this life of mine, no matter how swell it can be has this half-retarded brother living in the basement of his soul telling me that you can or should do this or that in spite of the open handed slap in the face that those things would ultimately give your Karma, so ultimately I DON'T do those things, and just sit in wild wonder and sleepless nights.
I also think, man, the media has really shit on the potential for the right things to happen. Everyone gets divorced, and there's praise for shallowness and materialism, and people like me are buried under a pile of used up whores.
I dunno, what's wrong with tucking your shirt in and handing a girl a couple of flowers without it being overanalyzed?
There. I just summed up my early to mid twenties and then some.
R.I.P Putey McPuterstein.
It totally froze up, told me there was a 'Kernal' problem or something, then asked me for a boot disk (which I'm pretty sure I no longer have).
It was a Wal-Mart special I bought back in 2003, then souped it up with better memory and video cards. Oh the times we've had.
Anyways, I just went without the web for about a week after I moved, and i had finally kicked my Facebook addiction. It was nice, but I felt kinda naked without being able to tap into the great portals of knowledge.
So now I'm with out computer again. I just purchased a used one through work and it should be on my doorstep within a week. Until then, peace out yo....I'm gonna go do some other stuff.
